Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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