i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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