I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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