i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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