I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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