are you still at the devil's house?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
There's always time for handjobs
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize