wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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