My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.