he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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