His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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