are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
