i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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