Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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