i just google imaged poop.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
