The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
