i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize