so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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