he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
