Where is the hickey?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
