Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
