SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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