Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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