i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
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I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
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The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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