help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i think i have two assholes
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
