I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize