Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize