Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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