well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize