Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
