we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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