the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
