just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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