please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
