i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
My bed smells like the plague
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
