this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize