READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize