if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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