it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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