he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
