there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
there is puke in my bra ... again
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