I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
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