Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
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She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
My day in three words: secret purse cake
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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