I faked an abortion last night.
Acid is not a monday night drug
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
