As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
All I want is dick and wine.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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