All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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