I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
