Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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