So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
