Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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