so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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